Heaven & Hell
The fun game of random chance and blind adherence to the arbitrary nonsensical dogmas of various faiths, for the entire family.
- # Birth.
- #2 Baptism.Oh, Bad Luck, you've dies before you've been christened, away under the low bar with you.
- #4 Confession. Oh, OK, you're forgiven then.
- #6 Sin. You have coveted your neighbour's fat ass. Go back 2 spaces.
- #15 Sacred cow. Cow in the way. Miss a turn.
- #16 Doubt. You have a crazy idea that extraordinary claims may require some evidence.
- #17 Night journey. Hitch a ride heavenward with Mo on the back of his magic flying horse.
- #18 Freethought. It has occurred to you that we live in a universe supernatural explanations. Go straight to Hell, do not pass purgatory.
- #20 Canopic jar. Good news. Someone shoved you organs into jar in case they come in handy later.
- #22 Paedo prist. They've found out about your kiddie fiddling. Never mind, I'm sure your're sorry, move forward to another diocese and try not to do it again.
- #23 Prayer. Woken by a chap yodelling from a broken lighthouse and arrive early to talk to your invisible friend.
- #37 Immortality. You have been achieved immortality. Remain here for the rest of the game. It may get a little tedious.
- #36 Jihad. You've killed some people who believe a different myth to you, how morally superior of you. Move closer to heaven.
- #35 Bad karma. You've had a very dodge mild coconut flavour curry. Go back to the toilet for a violent turnout.
- #41 Kosher. Eat a delicious bacon sandwich. Have to go back, but well worth it.
- #42 Hajj. Book a short weekend break in Mecca. (Don't forget your bingo marker pen).
- #43 Blind Earth. You manage to convince yourself that an impossible thing is true. How virtuous.
- #46 Near death experience. Follow the tunnel of light to heaven.
- #58 Prayer. Prayer. Gibber inanely and headbutt and old wall.
- #57 Communion. You enjoy a light snack from a dead Jew.
- #60 Adho Loka.
- #61 Madhya Loka.
- #62 Worship. Get up early on Sunday to tell your rather insecure God what a great chap he is.
- #64 Sati. Arse. Hubby's just died, best hop on the funeral pyre and catch him up.
- #65 Biasphemy. Someone was calling your imaginary friend names, so you quite rightly executed them.
- #66 Bugger. It was just a dream. As you were.
- #80 "Urdhva Loka. Upside, inside out. She's livin Urdhva Loka. She'll push and pull you down, livin' Urdhva Loka" - Ricky Martin.
- #79 Al-Maqam al-Amin.
- #76 Aaru (The Firmament).
- #75 Catummaharajas. Wait here for 9.216.000.000 years before your nect turn (The Firmament).
- #81 Jannat al-adn.
- #82 Shamayim.
- #84 Raquie. Stop for a cup of tea with the imprisoned fallen Angels. Miss a turn.
- #85 Jannat al-Ma'wa.
- #86 She Haqim. Tuck into a tasty manna bar and be reinvigorated.
- #100 Akanistha. The supreme heaven, only for those who achieved Nirvana.
- #99 Firdaws.
- #98 Swarga Loka.
- #97 Dar al-maqamah.
- #96 Bhuva Loka.
- #95 Daar al-salam.
- Limbo. Oh, hang on, theologians have had a rethink and decided that maybe Limbo doesn't actually exist and we might have just made it up for a bit of a laugh. Hmm, not sure what happens now. Throw an odd number to go to Hell
or an even number to go to heaven (Square 70).
- Hell. Welcome to hell, you will have to stay here now for the duration of the game, infact you can never ever play again and you'll have to stay here for eternity, being tortured. I know it's a bit harsh but I don't make the rules.
Blogger: The reason Stick; Twitter: @Crispian_Jago.